PART I — CLARITY

Chapter 3 of 10 · Online sample 3 of 10

The Timeline

If you’re reading this book, then you’ve reached the point where you know you have a problem. You probably also realise that you currently don’t know how to solve that problem. That’s perhaps the most important step of all: to admit that you’re not in control of this thing. With that established, the next step is to ask, ‘What on earth is going on?’ The answer, unfortunately, isn’t entirely straightforward, but the best place to start is the beginning.

Let’s look, then, at the complete timeline of addiction (how we got here) and recovery (where we’re going). This will be the launch pad for the work ahead.

Phases of Addiction and Recovery

As the following illustrates, the phases of addiction and recovery have distinct stages that overlap in the middle.

The phases of addiction and recovery, progressing from formation through commitment and into short-, mid- and long-term recovery

To determine exactly where you are and how you got there, we can identify and characterise these distinct stages in the overall trajectory. This is important because what you should focus on—and what will be most beneficial—changes depending on how far along you are, how far along you have been, and where you’re most likely to relapse.

Addiction Phase

The addiction phase consists of four main stages:

Formation

Formation is the stage where you first encounter alcohol, and drinking becomes embedded in your habitual behaviour. Social licensing normalises this process.

Awareness

Awareness is the stage where the negative consequences begin to seep into your consciousness. It starts to become apparent that your life is a disorganised mess. For example, you may be exhausted or overly emotional, but you don’t necessarily make the connection.

Realisation

Realisation is the stage where the negative effects are fully manifest and obviously linked to your drinking. These issues may affect your health, relationships, or career, for example. You reach a tipping point and can no longer deny that you have a problem. You attempt to stop but realise you’re not in control.

Commitment

Commitment is the stage where you have accepted the reality of your situation and orient yourself toward sorting it out no matter what. If you are reading this, you’ve almost certainly reached this stage. (Well done, by the way.)

Recovery Phase

The recovery phase, in brief, consists of the following stages:

Short-Term

Short-term recovery includes the first few days and weeks after you stop drinking. Relapse happens and isn’t particularly unexpected. The primary focus here is just to stop consuming alcohol and prioritise your comfort. Changing too much, too quickly, will likely cause more instability and backfire.

Mid-Term

Mid-term recovery begins after a month or two of sobriety. Alcohol is out of your system and no longer consumed. The primary focus of this stage is to maintain sobriety and intensify the process of repairing your physical, mental, and emotional health. Relapse is less likely than in short-term recovery, but pitfalls are many. They should be anticipated and overcome.

Long-Term

After regaining physical health and restoring overall stability, your attention turns toward working on emotional and psychological well-being. You are making real progress towards a better life, which at this point is self-evident. Relapse becomes even less likely as you don’t want to give up everything you have achieved.

As part of long-term recovery, you begin to move toward self-actualisation. Self-actualisation is where the person you were meant to be—without this little detour—is fully recovered. It is the highest level of personal development, where your potential is fully realised. And that’s where we’re headed. Sounds nice, doesn’t it?

So, where do you sit on this timeline? You’re certainly at the commitment stage and heading in the right direction.

We’ll revisit the timeline later, but for now, with a high-level understanding, we’re ready to explore the dynamics that led us here.